RSafak Uchiha

[RSafak23 1]

Kagami UCHİHA

As an Uchiha, Kagami had very powerful chakra. He was one of the members that were able to awaken his clan's kekkei genkai: the Sharingan, which granted him various advantageous abilities. These included seeing the flow of chakra, the ability to easily recognise genjutsu and different forms of chakra, some predictive capabilities, as well as the ability to copy techniques that the user sees amongst other things. In the anime, his visual prowess was praised by Danzō for saving his life many times. Kagami's descendant, Shisui, who was hailed as the strongest Uchiha of his timeand a wielder of the Mangekyō Sharingan, openly admitted he was inferior to his ancestor.

Shisui Uchiha 

Even by Uchiha standards, Shisui was noted to be one of the most talented members the famed clan ever had. Danzō even hailed him as the strongest Uchiha of his time. His abilities allowed him to rise to rank of jōnin four years into being a shinobi and eventually a captain of his own squad. His prowess was so widely known that an entire squad of Kiri-nin quickly chose to flee upon learning of his presence rather than to confront him. A further testament to his prowess is the fact that Kabuto Yakushi wanted to reincarnate him for the upcoming war but was unable to find a sufficient DNA sample for it.

RSafak Uchiha

Descendant of Kagami and Shisui Uchiha

He and his younger brother Chen was left in hokages building after 4th Great Nnja War 
Team 7 decided to take care of those newborn babies and raise them.
RSafak and Chen was both genius ninja and RSafak got the highest grades has ever seen in the academy
But sadly an incident happened in Hatake quarters when it was the night they were about to celebrate RSafak graduation from academy with team 7
When RSafak came from academy and beame a genin He could not find his brother in home 
He thought he could be with Sasuke or Naruto or even Sakura but than he remembered they all were very busy 
While he was trying to find his younger brother he saw his 8tail toy and he understood his brother was missing
He screamed in thoughts of his brother potentially was killed 
He felt so much pain than he awakened a 3 tomoe sharingan as his first sharingan 
and that was the time he understood this village was nothing but hatred 
people were so bad that they took his brother from him 
He decided to leave the village for good that night and search for what could have happened to his brother
And He became a rogue ninja 
After that when team 7 come to Kakashi's place they were very confused by why were not in the house 
Kakashi appointed some ninjas to find us but i never left any mark of me, only...
about a week later Kakashi found my last message for him 
he cried as he lost someone so important for him again but he stopped from searching for me and Chen as i asked him to

 

[AncientofLore 4]

While I like that you took the time to write this, it feels choppy and lacking in effort. This is coming from a place of feedback and not anything else, and you can easily choose to move past my advice, but I feel as though embedding your original character into the story in such a way that involves pretty much five people from canon lore is not only unoriginal, but it doesn't help you convey your story.
 

Not only do we not entirely know the lore direction that the server will be going in complete detail (at least I do not), saying that Team 7 adopted RSafak and Chen, his brother, is something that goes against both what they as characters would do, and what the lore after the war implies. To further touch on why the Big Three and two of the most recognized Uchiha characters deter from your own story, think about this; the time you spent figuring out how your character can be shoehorned into their stories in an unoriginal way, you could've easily spent figuring out a more plausible story that involves similar personalities but not the same characters. In roleplay, people will be thinking twice about interacting with a character that has such implications with the established lore. 

In terms of formatting, I think you could do much better to draw the eye. Add some better visuals, make title cards, and lower the font size of your paragraph text in order to help the reader understand that what you're writing is a paragraph and consequently part of the story. Make it more visually pleasing to people who will possibly want to interact with RSafak. 

Oh, and.. I don't get the decision of nomenclature here. Why are two of his first name's letters capitals, and why is his name more Middle-Eastern than Asian? In RP and in the world in general, immersion is something fragile and things like this do cause rifts between what's supposed to be present in the shinobi world and what is out of place. I'd suggest a name with meaning.

Those were all my points, and I'd like to remind you that this is meant in no way to deter you from your character concept but rather to help you improve it. Hope to see you in-game when it launches!

Edited August 23, 2021 by AncientofLore

[Tenshin 21]

We have quite the strict policy when it comes to using explicit Naruto branded content, while lore, abilities, clans, etc is fine till a certain degree, using the names of franchise characters is a big no-no, so you may want to rephrase quite a few things, cough, SHISUI

The comment above mine was quite decent when it came to constructive criticism.

If you need help or inspirational to create your character biography, you may take a look at mine, or others available in the forums.

Feel free to ask for help in the discord server as well.