.png.9beb693188fa4d2fcb90225abb8d577a.png)
Welcome to Shinobi Story!
tweego
-
Content Count
41 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Everything posted by tweego
-
It's nice. I like it. Potentially interested too.
-
Holy hell @Paul, your graphic and the way you describe your character. Man, I'm crossing both fingers and toes that I'll stumble across you in the world!
-
@Tommy, you're gonna make a record here. You're gonna be the first and only; 11/10. I appreciate you and your writing, a lot.
-
I'm just gonna hop in and give my view on things! It's a neat small graphic, but it's a bit.. Clustered. I like the way you're separating stories and including small pictures as to gain a small image of the scenarios. There's some repeating in words and sentences, such as; You also tend to use the word 'someone' a lot. Another substitution could be; ''He finally found a soul who can help him, a leader to follow and trust.'' However, with that being said; it's a nice work of writing.
-
It's quite neat, though I think the text and font is a bit too big. Your writing is somewhat good, but it definitely could use a bit of work. One of my tips would be to; give a friend or a fellow player a short draft of the biography so they can correct it or help wording things. The formatting is a blessing on my eyes, but then again; a bit too big.
-
Wow. This is a really good piece of writing. Personally, I'd love to see more information about Kido as an individual -- such as basic info; which could be his eye-colour, height and so forth. Either way, I'm excited to see the continued work on this.
-
As much as I want to like this biography, it's hard for me simply due to the way you're trying to foreshadow a strong and cautious persona; but it simply ends up as unoriginal. My advice would be to try to create a more original scenario in which your character's arc start. The graphics are pretty neat though, it's a bit clustered together, but still somewhat neat.
-
Welcome, welcome!
-
Ohayō! Welcome to Shinobi Story!
-
Welcome to our family!
-
I'm gonna chime in and agree with @Paul. Even though I'm rolling Uchiha, there's plenty of ways to counter it, it's all about out-smarting your enemies. Being a shinobi isn't about being strong, it's about being able to predict your enemies next movement. Heck, having one more talent point as 'clanless' can actually prove very valuable -- it's too early to determine what build is the most viable. My two cents is, remember the pros and cons of everything -- but don't take everything in moderation as we don't have anything to compare with; yet.
-
massah is lie. he say come rollplay. i come rollplay. but game not out! In all seriousness, I was lucky to have been approached by @Dan (massah) and eventually fell in quite quickly.
-
Today marks the day that @tweego realized that quoting is in fact, not spoiling.
-
I have but one task.. One goal in life. Find out who hurt @Aetherweaver.. Poor soul can't say anything without spoiling.
-
What a weird name. Let me guess.. You're secretly a dodo, aren't you?! Glad to finally have you in our presence.
-
The sheer amount of dedication, the finesse -- the grammar.. This.. This truly, is what one would call a master-piece.. Take notes everyone, quick!
-
I know you.. Good to have you onboard mate!
-
Hey Chaos, welcome to Shinobi Story! Enjoy your stay~.
-
Welcome Mitsugi! I look forward to meeting you ingame and getting to know you! Enjoy your stay~.
-
Topics made to be the "frist in history" make me laugh
tweego replied to
? -
Welcome!
-
Hey @Adrez, welcome to Shinobi Story!
-
I'm mindblown by the forums alone. I can't wait to see the rest!
-
Welcome to Shinobi Story. It's a pleasure having you with us!
-
Hey there @KayteTeike! This server and forum is English only. Please refer to Off-Topic or Support if you have any questions or need assistance.
